Most people who have taken care of others have often run across some sort of criticism of their performance. It could come from others, or even from yourself. It’s crucial to not unfairly judge yourself on every tiny mistake when you are helping people out. Here are 6 tips that will help you to stop the unfair judgement that happens to you.
Notice when you speak negatively to yourself
The first step in preventing self doubt is noticing when you do it. When you have a negative thought, write it down. If you were too hard on your mom or forgot your dad’s oatmeal, make sure to record the way you treat yourself. You may often over criticize yourself for small mistakes that everyone makes. The goal of writing it down is to help you realize what you are doing.
- Distract yourself from negative thoughts
After you notice your criticism better, it will get easier to recognize when you get to be hard on yourself. When you start to feel overwhelmed, stop and start taking deep breaths. Redirect your thoughts and think about something positive, or something that you are grateful for.
- Don’t compare yourself to others.
This will only make you feel worse. With that, you are usually comparing your worst moments with their best moments. Focus on what you are doing right. You might have found an amazing caregiver for your mom, or made sure that your husband is getting excellent care in a care community. Everyone makes choices based on their circumstances, this doesn’t make one caregiver better than another. Make sure to do what’s best for you and your older adult.
- Look at the big picture
Don’t scold yourself on every small detail. Beating yourself up about these things does not help. Think about what you truly value and make sure those needs are being met. Your older adult’s mental state would be more important than worrying about the house being messy. Itr may also be worth just picking your battles with an older adult who has dementia and keeps things peaceful when possible.
- Talk to there’s that have similar situations
Hearing from others can sometimes give you a new perspective. Caregiver support groups can be a great place to connect with others in your same situation. You can learn about their experiences and how they deal with them. Getting advice from other caregivers can help you to realize that you are not alone in this.
- Keep a Success Journal
This will help you to overcome negative thoughts. Every day, keep a record of all the things you did well. Seeing your wins on paper may show how much more successful you are than you think. It’s vital to not be too hard on yourself when caring for others as long as you’re making a good effort.
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